Moraff's Revenge is one of those really old games, made back in the days when no one had heard of CGI and Sega Master System was hot stuff, that you now download to kill time, boot up, and go 'What the HELL?' The game is yet another RPG-style D&D rip-off, with your principle objective being to go down into dungeon, kill things, get treasure, go up to village and buy stuff that help you kill bigger things, heal for exorbitant prices, go back down to dungeon. I have vague memories of being told of a Fountain Of Youth attainable on Level Six Billion and Three (well actually level 70, although in the time you take to reach it you may as well have not bothered, since you started searching at age fifteen and gain it at age ninety-seven). You can even play elves and hobbits if you want to, although this doesn't seem to have any noticeable effect on gameplay (since you can change your randomly-generated stats and there is no player-character graphic). The only choice you make that WILL effect your gameplay is whether you choose to become a fighter or a wizard, the difference being of course that wizards can cast spells and fighters can use weapons higher than a knife. At the time it came out it boasted, if I remember the box correctly, of '3D environments', which in those days meant that you could move in four directions. It's true that there is a section down in your screen in which you can see, in first person, to your left, right, back, and front, but the views look all identical anyway, even regardless of whether you are down in the dungeons or up in the village. The passages of the dungeons/village you explore are a maze of outlined passages with the occasional garish red door, giving the impression of the Office Complex from Hell. Occasionally a monster will appear in one of them. The monsters are just as cute as the environments, with five or so templates for about fifteen different creatures, which means you get Mr 2D Happy Frog playing the role of things like Giant Killer Toad, Venomous Salamander, and the Long-Legged Scissor Man. Personally my favourite part of the game is the encouraging and mature little message you get when your non-specific little character meets their unfortunate demise (YOU ARE DEAD HA HA HA). It's not what you'd call memorable, but gameplay is somewhat enjoyable, so long as you're in the mood for a wander-about-aimlessly-in-samey-looking-dungeon-levels-and-pound-wildly-at-the-weapon-key-when-something-moves sort of game. It's very silly and pointless but its creator Steve Moraff obviously had fun making it and that's the important thing. Note: Although it doesn't say so on Moraffware's official website, all of the old Moraffware shareware games are still sold. Contact their sales dept. at the e-mail provided below for details. Reviewed by: Rhubarb Celestial |